I’ve compiled a listing of trusted resources and information from my personal betrayal trauma healing journey. This is not an exhaustive list by any stretch. I wanted to include a few things mainly for a wife who is at the beginning or early stages of her path to healing. These are all things I needed early on as well as a few newer options that I wish I would have found sooner. A couple of the resources I share have “sexual addiction” in the title or description. While addiction may not be the case in every husband’s story, I found the information in these resources to be beneficial in my healing journey.
Tag Archives: betrayal
Listen to an audio recording of this blog post here:
I’ve spent the bulk of my life doing my level best to avoid pain. I’m simply not a fan of it. The thought of experiencing physical or emotional pain flips my fight or flight switch on in a clock tick. Somehow along the way, I developed super-Spidey senses that alert me to incoming pain and I get busy to head it off at the pass.
31 years ago today, on the day I got married, I was 21. There was a lot I didn’t know. A lot! I look back now and can see just how utterly clueless my 21-year-old self was about life, love, and marriage. I’ve heard it said that love is blind and that perhaps it’s good that it is for no one would ever marry.
This is more of a stream of consciousness post. Obviously, my consciousness lacks brevity. I have been keeping this list of things I’ve been learning over these last nine months while in recovery from well, my life. While I know the list will continue to grow as I grow, I felt like I should share what I’ve learned so far. With an unapologetic 3000+ words, clearly, I’ve been learning a lot. Don’t be intimidated. Just read and digest what you can. If this is not for you, feel free to pass it by. I’m a believer in writing what I need to read so I’m guessing someone else out there needs to read this too. If not, that’s fine. It’s been good for me to log my recovery progress in this way.
You might be wondering why I am praying for my husband who chose to betray our marriage covenant. Honestly, sometimes I wonder the same thing.
Max Lucado writes in his book, Anxious for Nothing, “The path to peace is paved with prayer.” In these days of utter turmoil, peace sounds very very good.
Dear friends and family,
You know how “they” say, “there’s always more to the story?” Well, if I didn’t believe that before (which I did), I certainly do now.
There’s no easy way to tell you this except to just spit it out.
Due to the recent discovery of my husband’s choices, he and I have entered into a season of therapeutic separation. Our marriage is very broken. I’m sure many of you are stunned but no one could be more stunned than I.
Dear hurting wife, I see you.
I see you because I am you.
I see your despair behind those honest but cleverly crafted Facebook posts.
I see your questions because I, too, have questions.
I see your fears for I, too, battle the all-consuming flames.
I see your utter loneliness while standing in the midst of the crowd.