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Tag Archives: marriage

There’s always more to the story.

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There’s always more to the story.

Dear friends and family,

You know how “they” say, “there’s always more to the story?” Well, if I didn’t believe that before (which I did), I certainly do now.

There’s no easy way to tell you this except to just spit it out.

Due to the recent discovery of my husband’s sinful choices, he and I have entered into a season of therapeutic separation. Our marriage is very broken. I’m sure many of you are stunned but no one could be more stunned than I.

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Love is a verb, not a day.

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Love is a verb, not a day.

In the earlier years of our marriage, Valentine’s Day (aka Love Day) loomed in the horizon when the calendar flipped from January to February. We waited for the day clunking aimlessly around with our unspoken and residual unmet expectations. For years, we bought into the commercialization of the day. The 15th of February came with sadness, disappointment and hurt. Our “Love Day” wasn’t always a flop but I must say that chocolate was sometimes one of the few things that turned out right. Can you relate?

My husband and I have been married for nearly three decades. Over these years, we’ve learned a thing or two from the truest form of dumb luck, some things from wise counsel and even more from the school of hard knocks. Throughout the years and tears, one thing we have learned is that love is a verb, not a day.

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Dear hurting wife, I see you.

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Dear hurting wife, I see you.

Dear hurting wife, I see you.

I see you because I am you.

I see your despair behind those honest but cleverly crafted Facebook posts.

I see your questions because I, too, have questions.

I see your fears for I, too, battle the all-consuming flames.

I see your utter loneliness while standing in the midst of the crowd.

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Dear Old Husband, You Are My Favorite Adventure

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Dear Old Husband, You Are My Favorite Adventure

Dear old husband,

I’m aware that neither of us really think of ourselves as old. I wonder if we’ll be old when we’re 80. I’m not quite sure. I don’t know what “old” is but I think we’re there and if not, we must be close because the physical signs are flashing in neon at this point. There are times when I simply can’t believe all that we’ve made it through but then there are times when I’m reminded of every single adventure as they run deep throughout my slowing bones.

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We Kissed Anyway (and it wasn’t Valentine’s Day)

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We Kissed Anyway (and it wasn’t Valentine’s Day)

I’m going to be honest with you (as I always am). This picture wasn’t taken on Valentine’s Day. I don’t know the exact day but this picture was taken in the hardest season (not exaggerating) our marriage has ever endured. I look back at it with wonder.

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A Different Kind of Happy: Musings on Our 28th Anniversary

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A Different Kind of Happy: Musings on Our 28th Anniversary

As I watched the video I put together of our “life so far” eight years ago for our 20th anniversary, a flood of emotions made their way to my eyes and gently trickled down my cheeks. It wasn’t like other times, though. This time the 3 minutes and 26 second photo journal concluded with a deep inhale of relief rather than exhales of grief.

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130 Years of Secrets to #StayingInLove

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130 Years of Secrets to #StayingInLove

I count it a high honor to have been able to share some marriage thoughts from my personal experience about staying in love with my spouse with four amazing women on Mrs. Disciple’s blog. Together, the wives who have contributed to these articles have over 130 years of marriage experience. If you are married or plan to be someday, I think you will find it worth your time to read the wisdom here.

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