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Tag Archives: trust

“Did you get the guacamole?” and Other Questions to Ask Someone When They’re Hurting

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“Did you get the guacamole?” and Other Questions to Ask Someone When They’re Hurting

If you’ve ever been through a season when pain, loss, and grief seem to overtake your mind, body, and soul, you are probably like me and ultra-sensitive to certain questions. Anyone requesting anything of you can seem judgmental and/or condemning, and can also add to our already teetering juggling act. If you’ve been on the other side of the coin and you love someone who is hurting, your sincere desire to help could actually add to their pain. Sometimes, albeit with heartfelt intentions, we ask the wrong questions and sometimes we ask the right questions the wrong way.

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Hearts At the Table: When Empathy Evaporates Shame by Terri Fullerton

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Hearts At the Table: When Empathy Evaporates Shame by Terri Fullerton

When I think about all of the adventurous dining experiences I’ve had it brings me a smile that fills my soul and makes my taste buds (and sometimes my whole body) do a little jig. My global food adventures have brought me countless wonderful and exciting memories. Since my memories are so positive, I assumed that everyone else would crave the same experiences. I never once stopped to think about how others might not be so keen to take their taste buds on a road trip. Until I sat across the table in a French cafe from my dear friend, Terri, in England.

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Dear hurting wife, I see you.

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Dear hurting wife, I see you.

Dear hurting wife, I see you.

I see you because I am you.

I see your despair behind those honest but cleverly crafted Facebook posts.

I see your questions because I, too, have questions.

I see your fears for I, too, battle the all-consuming flames.

I see your utter loneliness while standing in the midst of the crowd.

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